Since last I wrote, my Granddaddy (my girls call him Gabby) has gone to be with Jesus. It was a longer fight with cancer than even the doctors expected, but in the end, he crossed the Jordan in peace. The funeral was beautiful. Many tears and words of love and remembrance for Gabby. As I preached his funeral service, I could not help but laugh a little on the inside. I mean, here we are crying over losing this precious man while he’s celebrating like crazy with God Himself. I can just imagine his crooked grin and his beautiful teary eyes as he worships and laughs and whoops out loud. What an amazing picture!

Since then there has also been a lot of struggle in my business. Some of it due to other ventures that have had varied measures of success. The idea of continuing through the feast or famine seasons of freelancing for the next 20 years is terrifying, especially since I cannot keep up with the speedy pace of technology. The competition is tough and the pay is thinning. I can however expand on my creativity and experience in to new areas of business.

I’ve never forgotten the definition of “insanity”— doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. So it seems clear that I have to change something. But what? Am I too old to learn a new career? or can I find something related to my experience that can take off in a new direction? Believe me when I say I’ve gone through just about every notion and idea. Some have been exciting and realistic, others are just so far out there that it’s hard to see a way.

Passion must be the fuel that drives anything you want to stand the test of time. That’s why some ideas and some roads aren’t viable or realistic. They may be successful for those who have passion for them, but disaster for those that don’t. Your drive for something can last only so long on desire alone. Even a great work ethic cannot replace passion. You’ve heard it said, “Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Well, that’s more true than your father or business professor might want to admit. I mean, how many people do you know (you might be one of them) who work at a J-O-B that they really don’t love just for the paycheck. It may be a steady, secure way of living, but never fulfilling, especially for men.

I don’t mean to imply that providing a steady income and secure financial foundation are less important that being passionate about what you do. There is honor in that life. But God has given us all gifts. Not using them is not only frustrating to our spirit, but also a disservice to the body of Christ.

Maybe I’m just stubborn and rebellious toward authority (it’s a streak I won’t admit), but common sense tells me that I can’t just start doing something else like working at Walmart or going to Chiropractic school. I’d be starting at the bottom of the pay scale, having to learn everything from scratch, dismissing all of my instincts, passion and experience —all while wishing I could be doing something else. So what am I supposed to do? I’d like a dream job, but I can’t find one. I’d like to work for myself, but the famine side of the equation is the hardest to overcome. It doesn’t provide the consistency and security my family requires.

While I wrote that last paragraph, it dawned on me that the only thing I must overcome is the famine. I already have passion for the work. So overcoming the things that allow the famine to persist would solve my problem. Hmmm… Gotta think on that one… Thanks for listening…

Share this on

The Good, the Bad, and the Weird

What to do when one or more of your group members is a little odd

Matt Graybill |  posted 8/09/2010

Topics:	Difficult people, Group dynamics, Interpersonal skills, Patience, Problems, Respect
Filters:	Apprentice, Connect, Group Leader, Member
Purpose:	Fellowship
References:	Matthew 25:31-46
Date Added:	August 09, 2010

1 of 1

I find that many people are hesitant to enter into a new small group because they’re afraid of being stuck with a “weird person.” To be honest, I used to say the same thing—until one came into our group.

Tom’s Story

“Tom” (name changed) was definitely different. During our group time, he never talked, he crunched ice real loudly, he never participated in bringing food, and he usually showed up one or two hours early for group. Tom was a regular and it was rare if he missed. He was frustrating to deal with and I found myself getting annoyed with every thing he did—until the day I received a surprising e-mail from him.

The background of that email happened one night when my wife and I couldn’t be with our group, so we asked another couple to take the lead. Our group was studying the “love language” of affirmation. The couple that was leading thought it would be cool to tape a piece of paper on everyone’s back and have group members write words reflecting what they appreciated about that person.

The next day, I received the e-mail from Tom. He told me how much he appreciated our life group. He explained how he had never had any friends in life, and that we were his first. He told me he never experienced anyone saying such nice things about him. I couldn’t believe I had been so blinded by Tom’s “weirdness” that I failed to see his heart and hear his story.

When we take a look at the kind of people Jesus hung out with, we see that he reached out to the outcasts—those who everyone looked down upon. People like Tom need others, many times in more ways than the rest of us. People like Tom can be overwhelming, so it is important that we create boundaries—and that we are honest with them. Most importantly, it’s important that we aim to see their heart.

There were times before group that I would talk to Tom individually and set boundaries with him about coming early or contributing to the group by bringing a snack. To my surprise, he already knew some of the areas that I talked to him about; he just wasn’t sure how to deal with some of his struggles. One thing Tom said that I’ll never forget is that he wished I would have talked to him about my frustrations earlier. He really appreciated the times I was honest with him, which allowed him to start taking risks in the group.

Tom eventually started to bring snacks, he even baked something once, and he also started to open up after I encouraged him to share with the group about his fears. Ultimately, it was all of us being honest and compassionate with one another that helped build walls of trust for Tom to feel safe and to grow.

What Will You Do?

So what will you do when it comes to reaching out to the “weird person” in your group? Here are five tips that have really helped me out:

1. Understand that you are weird, too. In other words, take the beam out of your eye first before removing a splinter from another person in your group.
2. Take time to understand their story and who they are.
3. Be honest with them on a one-on-one level about what is “weird.”
4. Set a few realistic boundaries for them, and in some circumstances boundaries that include consequences.
5. Continue to love them with grace and truth.

It’s easy to see in this story how our group affected Tom, but he had an even greater impact on our group because we learned how to love like Christ—which has always been our ultimate goal.

—Matt Graybill is Director of Community LIFE for the “Lives Changed By Christ” church family in Pennsylvania. Copyright 2010 by the author and Christianity Today International. Used with permission.

Share this on

My very first reaction is extreme sadness and pain of my own. Granddaddy Burleson (my children call him “Gabby”) has been so precious to me. I have the most amazing memories of him, and I adore him as if he were my own father. And having experience the loss of my own father a couple of years ago, I am all too familiar with the pain and sorrow that is imminent. It’s like losing my daddy all over again.

I don’t suppose I expected Gabby to live forever on this earth… just until Jesus came. I am pretty sure that’s what my mom has come to expect as well. But suddenly, we’re expecting Jesus to come even more quickly.

If you’ve ever lost anyone close to you— a parent, a child, a spouse, a brother or sister— then you know the tremendous hurt and helpless feelings that come with such an event. If you are a believer— a true, born again follower of Jesus— then you also know the grace and peace that only God’s Holy Spirit can infuse into the situation.

When I got the message from my mom about Gabby, I began to write some words of encouragement for her. Maybe you can use the same encouragement that has now encouraged me:

Sorry you’ve been thrown into this so suddenly, Mom. I love you and am praying for you even now.

Remember that God’s strength is not only greater than ours, but different. It doesn’t grow weak or even the least bit winded. So even when you are weak, tired or winded, He’s not. Lean on Him with JOY, not complaint or despair. Decide now that no matter what comes tomorrow or the next day or whenever, that you will face each moment with JOY that does not depend upon your strength, but upon the Father’s.

You are to be free of anxiety, worry, despair, hopelessness, depression, etc and full of JOY. You may find it difficult to be very enthusiastic or happy, but JOY trumps them all. Since JOY comes from the Father, it is not like any of your human emotions, and in the same way that God’s strength is different, so is His JOY.

I’m not using this as a pep talk or rally, but as a reminder that you are the Father’s child and so is Granddaddy. And just as FAITH is the evidence of things not seen, JOY is the reaction to HOPE born through FAITH.

Are you sensing a theme here yet? You LOVE and are LOVED, because God is LOVE. His JOY is your strength. His PEACE is beyond your comprehension, and His PATIENCE through you is an expression of His humanity. You can only be KIND in spite of unkind circumstances because His KINDNESS is otherworldly.

I read in a book* recently an amazing narrative of God speaking to a person about a tragedy. He said,

“…There are millions of reasons to allow pain and hurt and suffering rather than to eradicate them, but most of those reasons can only be understood within each person’s story. I am not evil. You [humanity] are the ones who embrace fear and pain and power and rights so readily in your relationships. But your choices are also not stranger than my purposes, and I will use every choice you make for the ultimate GOOD and the most loving outcome…..

You really don’t understand yet. You try to make sense of the world in which you live based on a very small and incomplete picture of reality. It is like looking at a parade through the tiny knothole of hurt, pain self-centeredness, and power, and believing you are on your own and insignificant. All of these contain powerful lies. You see pain and death as ultimate evils and God as the ultimate betrayer, or perhaps, at best, as fundamentally untrustworthy. You dictate the terms and judge my actions and find me guilty. The underlying flaw in your life is that you don’t think that I am good. If you knew I was good and that everything the means, the ends, and all the processes of individual lives— is all covered by my goodness, then while you might not always understand what I am doing, you would trust me. But you don’t.”

That’s powerful and, I believe very scriptural in its essence. God is GOOD. And His GOODNESS lives in you and works through you.

The kind of FAITHFULNESS that God gives to us (because we cannot produce an ounce on our own) is solid and unwavering in the fiercest of storms. Like a strong oak tree, it is firm and grounded. Unmoving. Be an OAK.

You wouldn’t think that such a firmness could exude an equally soft GENTLENESS. But that’s how the Holy Spirit works. Almost soft as silk, still strong as steel. You are filled with all of these GIFTS and able to have SELF-CONTROL because of these GIFTS.

Granddaddy has been given ALL of these gifts as well. Don’t forget that for a minute. I’ll let you ponder what that means for yourself.

I love you Mom!

Following His Lead,

Shawn

*The Shack” by Wm. Paul Young

Share this on

I seem to attach so much of my self-worth to the level of success I am or am not having. I hear these accusative thoughts race through my mind only to be chased away by what I can only explain as the protective Holy Spirit of God reminding me of God’s truth: “I am His and He is mine.”

There is a dark lie that follows me around just waiting for the chance to disguise itself in a false shroud of truth. It’s actually very simple to recognize when exposed by the Light. But under an overcast sky or in the shadows of stressful days, it can suffocate your hopes and shred your self-esteem. The darkness, even in it’s slightest shade of gray, seeks only to overcome the Light.

By now, I’m sure that you may be thinking of some of the words I hear in those low moments…

“Loser! You can’t even make enough to pay the bills. How do you expect to make her happy or be able to send your kids to college? Just give up. It’s hopeless. God doesn’t really care about you, or else He would do something about your situation? How could you even begin to believe that He could love someone like you? He knows about your lustful heart and your hateful attitude. What makes you think He could ever use you for anything?”

Any of those sound familiar? At least some version of them? You may say, “but those thoughts are so easily recognized as lies.” Really? Even in the midst of your darkest days or desperate situations? You see, that’s exactly when the enemy will use the cover of darkness to make such lies seem palatable. Especially since we seem wallow in, and to some degree enjoy, our own self-pity.

Enter Truth.

A couple of years or so ago, one of my favorite bands called Casting Crowns came out with a new song entitled “Voice of Truth.” It has been an inspiring song to millions of Christians all over the world chiefly because it describes this very common battle of lie versus truth, darkness versus light. Here’s some of the lyrics that are so poignant:

But the giant’s calling out my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times I’ve tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me time and time again
“Boy you’ll never win, you’ll never win.”

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says “do not be afraid!”
and the Voice of truth says “this is for My glory”
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

That’s the Voice that chases away the lies. The lies that tell you that you are something other than what you truly are: Loved.

Did you know that if you are born again— a true, repentant, blood-bought believer— then what is true of Jesus is true of you? Read that again if you need to. It’s powerful.

Since as a believer, you are a saint in Jesus Christ by God’s calling, you share in Jesus’ inheritance. That which is true of Jesus is now true of you, because you are in Christ. It’s part of your identity.

The list in this PDF download itemizes in first-person language who you really are in Christ. These are some of the scriptural traits which reflect who you became at spiritual birth. You can’t earn them or buy them any more than a person born in America can earn or buy the rights and freedoms he enjoys as an American citizen. They are guaranteed to him by the Constitution simply because he was born in the United States. Similarly, these traits are guaranteed to you by the Word of God simply because you were born into God’s holy nation by faith in Jesus Christ.

Although this list is pretty long, I encourage you to read it all. I have to read this list over and over again, because my human brain has difficulty wrapping itself around the vastness of this Voice of Truth.

So if your day or week has been long, stressful or just downright depressing, listen to the Voice of Truth. Read God’s listing of who you are. For me it starts and ends with, “I am His and He is mine.”

Download this PDF: Who Am I? Let me know how it impacts you!

Share this on

What is true spiritual freedom all about? Is there a way that humans can really live in spiritual freedom? Yes, yes… I can already hear all of the theologians and seminary students, even Sunday School teachers answering me from all over the Bible Belt, “Of course there is! It’s found in Jesus.” And that would make my point. Technically you would be right, but the question is much deeper than the simple process of praying the prayer of salvation. It’s really about living free. Free from guilt. Free from expectations. Free from the Law. Free from rules.

Don’t even start. I know you’re thinking something like, “But we have to have rules or else there would be anarchy.” OR “Yes, Shawn, but freedom still has it’s parameters.” Ok. You may be right about our society, but should it be that way in our spiritual community? or in our churches? It shouldn’t be. God doesn’t want it to be. He wants us to live in His freedom. He says that He wants us to have life to the fullest, without rules. Full of the expectancy of the joy of being in right relationship with the Father.

No rules. Just relationship.

To me, it’s like being an addict. An addict has no idea of how enslaved he is until he discovers the freedom of sobriety. It doesn’t make the lure of the addiction disappear, but makes each day a choice for freedom or slavery. And each has its own consequences.

If we had the relationship with the Father the way He intends, there would be no need for rules. No expectations. As a matter of fact, He makes it clear in scripture that there are no expectations or rules anymore.

Romans 6:14 — For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.

In the same way, God does not want us to be slaves forced to love Him. Rather, He would have us choose to be in relationship with Him, because forced worship is no worship at all. How on earth do we continue subscribing to the same idea that we have to be good enough or follow someone’s idea of what good is? Paul says that all things are lawful for me. That is, I can do whatever I want… and the consequences aren’t measured in sin and forgiveness. That’s been settled at the cross, right?

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. Romans 8:1-2

Does that mean that there are NO consequences for our actions? Of course not. It’s just that the consequences are more natural than judgment. In other words, if I do things that cause separation in any relationship (even with God), there is a strain on that relationship that inhibits good things from happening in that relationship. Conversely, when relationships are healthy and loving, void of strain and separation, then positive experiences and expectancy bring joy and satisfaction into that relationship. It just so happens that our choices to be in right relationship with the Father bring His favor and blessing, while our choices to live out of right relationship to God bring poor consequences.

If you want to leap off of a cliff, God would advise you not to do it because He know the consequences are not good. That does not mean you are forbidden to do it or that god won’t love you even if you do. It does mean that it breaks His heart because you will suffer, and He does not want that. It’s your choice to live in relationship or not. Both have their own consequences, but you’re fee to choose.

Without Christ’s salvation, there is no freedom from anything. Especially sin. And the Law still condemns. There is no freedom outside of the relationship with the Father.

Having a hard time buying this stuff? Have a look at what Paul says in Romans 6:20-23 (Message version):

^20-21As long as you did what you felt like doing, ignoring God, you didn’t have to bother with right thinking or right living, or right anything for that matter. But do you call that a free life? What did you get out of it? Nothing you’re proud of now. Where did it get you? A dead end.

^22-23But now that you’ve found you don’t have to listen to sin tell you what to do, and have discovered the delight of listening to God telling you, what a surprise! A whole, healed, put-together life right now, with more and more of life on the way! Work hard for sin your whole life and your pension is death. But God’s gift is real life, eternal life, delivered by Jesus, our Master.

What he’s saying is that when you love God, you will want to please him in the relationship, and He will pour out life on you like you’ve never experienced. That’s freedom.

Share this on

I guess there is some part of me that understands the absent minded state that would have to be partly at fault. It’s the same stress-driven focus that clouds our minds each day as we get so set on the tasks before us that we allow the stress of life to overcome our awareness of God’s presence. We’re reminded countless times in God’s Word that He is always there, always faithful, always dependable, always aware, and in all ways always. How do we forget that? I mean, how for the love of chocolate do we “forget” that the God who made us, who made it all, doesn’t have a problem with appointments. He has no need for a blackberry or a PDA of any kind. He’s just always there— ready.

I get the idea that we sometimes FEEL alone or that God has somehow left us hanging, even temporarily. But the fact is that our feelings don’t change the fact that God IS always with us. He knows our feelings and our worries. He understands our needs and our desperation. He gets the idea that stress is overwhelming. And none of it changes Him or moves Him one inch.

He never said we wouldn’t have our days of suffering. In fact, He promised that we would suffer in this world. But then again, we are not of this world, are we? I forget that sometimes.

Share this on

“For He shall grow up before Him as a tender plant, and as a root out of dry ground. He has no form or comeliness; And when we see Him, there is no beauty that we should desire Him.”
Isaiah 53:2 (NKJV)

Don’t judge a book by its cover. Why? Because even though (as a designer) I hope to convey the quality  of a book by the cover I design, the enduring value of a book isn’t determined by its cover but by the quality of its content. The stories of Shakespeare, Dickens, and Melville live on because of their greatness, not because of their covers. Consequently, wise readers will choose a book based on what they know about the content.

The same principle applies when we look at the life of Jesus. He certainly had a cover, an outward appearance. But it wasn’t the kind of cover that would have caught anyone’s attention. As a matter of fact, Isaiah prophesied that the outward appearance of Christ would contain no beauty that we should desire Him (Isaiah 53:2 NKJV). Think it through. He was born in a barn to underprivileged parents and with no one but lowly shepherds and animals to welcome Him into the world—a beginning as humble as anyone ever had.

According to His “cover,” Jesus was just a social side note. People like Him didn’t accomplish or achieve much. In fact, they were barely a blip on the radar screen of life. But the content of His character influenced the world in a way that defies comparison. To this day, His story is the preeminent factor by which spiritual, cultural, and political lines are drawn. All this came in an ordinary cover that most would have passed over.

This gives us an insight into the Lord’s heart: He values the content of our lives, not our appearance or social status. During this Christmas season with its parties and social occasions, may we robe ourselves in humility and think less about our “covers” and more about what we do for Him.

“For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 NKJV)

Do you get caught up in social appearances during the holiday season? Have you ever known someone who liked to make a grand entrance? Look at Luke Chapter 2. What kind of appearance did Jesus make when He came to earth? Make a point of not judging people based on their appearance, especially at holiday parties and family get-togethers this month. Take the time to talk to people—and listen to them—so you can truly see their heart.

Merry Christmas! Celebrate! That’s what Christmas is for!

Following His Lead,

Shawn…

Share this on

The there are those on the other side that say, “Don’t be so dramatic. Halloween is just harmless fun.” OK, I’ll buy that… to a point. or maybe to an age level.

I can remember being a kid on Halloween. It was a lot of fun to dress up in whatever I could find to wear (Mom rarely would buy us Halloween costumes… she made us use our brains creatively) and collect as much  loot as my pillowcase could hold. But I also remember the mischief of many a teenager as well.

So how do we as Christians handle this with our kids?

I believe as long as we are teaching outr children the Word, and telling them the truth, we can allow them to have fun. Especially with the alternatives like “Fall Festivals,” “Trunk or Treat,” or whatever, there are many ways to be included in the fun without indulging in the scary side of it all.

And then there is the idea that maybe we just don’t participate at all. Turn off the porch light, close the curtains and watch TV or go out to eat or something. I don’t know how effective we are in defeating evil or the propagation of the occult or anything by sticking our heads in the sand. We’re sure not promoting the gospel in any way.

We are trying to find creative ways to be “in” the world, but not “of” it. Like what we’ve been doing for a couple of years now. Giving away million dollar bills along with the candy. This year we have the ones with Hanna Montana (Miley Cyrus) other youth celebrities in characature. Each one has a simple straight-forward and effective presentation of the gospel on the back. (Get them from WayOfTheMaster.com) Everyone loves them and my daughters have a blast giving them to kids. We are praying that kids and parents read them and keep them around. Who knows? God says that His Word will not return void.

Living in such a way as to go where Jesus would go, do what Jesus would do, say what Jesus would say… all without judging what is only His to judge… isn’t that the M.O. we should adopt? Or are we afraid we’ll be seen as hypocrites or sell-outs? I think that’s a risk I’m willing to take.

Share this on

You gotta read this article about a ministry up in Wisconsin that is holding services in a bar. That’s right, a bar with beer, cigarettes, the real deal. What’s funny to me about this is that my wife and I were just talking a couple of days ago about this kind of risk-taking ministry. There’s always a shock value and controversy to something like this, but then there’s also the idea that this is really the kind of ministry that Jesus would have been involved with. Do you think that He would be proud of what most churches do in the name of ministry? Or would He be found in this bar sitting next to a couple of guys nursing beers?

See, I’m just not convinced that what most of our culture accepts as “church” is really what Jesus intended for His church to be. Where did He imply that He wanted a democratically run congregation that met once or twice a week for a pep talk and song service? I think this group may be on to the very idea that Jesus had for His church.

When was the last time you verbally shared your faith with anyone without an argument or offense? When was the last time your church was so determined to reach people with the gospel that it was willing to risk something? …break free from the status quo? …take a chance all for the sake of someone who may not hear about Jesus otherwise?

So let’s take a line from Toby Mac… “If you gotta start somewhere, why not here? If you gotta start sometime, why not now?”

Share this on

In those tough, pioneering days back when I was starting as a pastor, I worked at SWBYP’s for a while as a yellow pages representative. I’ll pause while you try to visualize that for a moment . .

Although I worked in the telephone sales department. I had to waer a tie and a name tag. Ties make me break out and I never understood the purpose of the name tag for those that never see anyone. It was at that time was that they had an internal corporate program designed to help employees feel a sense of ownership and pride in their work. As a part of that program, our name tags made a public statement that was sometimes hard to live up to.

Every day a sign on my chest proclaimed:

Shawn is SWBYP’s

I remember staring at that badge the very first time they handed it to me. I recall feeling some serious disagreement with that statement. “But . . . but I’m not SWBYP’s,” I remember thinking. “I’m Shawn! And if I am SWBYP’s . . . wow . . . I have a lot of money and a really long name!”

Actually, my reluctance to put on the name tag had nothing to do with money. It had to do with the sense of responsibility attached to the concept. I felt the weight of it. Which was the point.

The marketing people rightly understood that a customer’s impression of SWBYP’s as a company would be formed largely by his or her encounters with the humans representing the company—in person or not.

The “Shawn is SWBYP’s” name tag program was launched in hopes that those of us who were wearing one would consider for a moment that people form their impression of the company based upon their impression of us.

The program recognized a sad-but-true law of human nature: Encounter a bad employee, infer that it must be a bad company.

Here’s the thing. The same law is in operation every day where your life and God’s kingdom are concerned. Let me explain.

You Have to Represent

Whether we recognize it or not, you and I walk around every day wearing a big “Shawn is Christianity” sign. (Except your sign probably doesn’t say “Shawn.” Unless, of course, your name is Shawn, too.) When people run into a bad Christian, they think that Christ is also as bad.

You may be thinking, “Oh, Pastor Shawn, you’ve taken this too far. Surely people know that some Christians are bad. But they don’t hold it against God.”

Are you sure?

Across my many years of ministry, I have encountered countless people whose testimony was that they were turned on to Christ because they met a great representative. And I’ve met many others who were turned off to God because they had encountered a bad one.

I felt a certain amount of pressure just knowing I was going to be shaping others’ impressions of a yellow page company. How much more sobering should it be to know that our life and conduct will impact people’s views of their only hope for eternal life?

Of course, Jesus had some encouragement for us along these lines:

“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men. You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.

Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:13–16)

Yes, being Christ’s representatives to a hurting world is a sobering responsibility. But it is also a great joy and privilege.

Don’t forget about that name tag you’re wearing. You can’t see it with your natural eyes, but it’s there!

Share this on